Understand someone else's point of view unconditionally . . .
By not understanding someone else's point of view unconditionally, you can log jam your success. Saying that you understand someone and then putting a condition on it makes you lose power and influence to collaborate effectively. For example, when you say, "I understand that you don't want to go to the movies but I think you would really like to see this movie with me," you haven't really understood the other person. As a result, you will have less of an ability to collaborate with them because you've added a "but" to the condition. You think they might want to go with you because you know them or think you understand them enough that they would like to go with you in spite of them saying that they didn't. Even more unfortunately, you might even imply that it's better if they go with you than to not go. Does this sound familiar? In another scenario, you could say, "I understand that you do not want to go to the movies. What would you like to do instead?" In this case, you show an openness and an understanding without the "but." Furthermore, you could find out why they do not want to go to movies at this time or in general. This way both can learn from the situation and you might even end up going to a movie on another day that's actually better for both of you or doing a fun, alternative activity that you hadn't originally considered. By understanding another person unconditionally, you've got a greater chance for success.
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